Online Dating for Dummies

Online Dating for Dummies
by: H M Hovis

Whether you have been dating for years, getting back in the game, or just starting out, you could always use a bit of dating advice. Not the kind you get from your mother, but rather the kind that actually might get you past the first date, on to the 2nd and perhaps on to a happily ever after. So you have decided to date and you are thinking about the "online dating" thing? Well, why not. To be cliche' everyone is doing it! In today's action packed, hustle, bustle world, who had time or energy to meet the traditional ways. Online meeting has become a norm, and is gaining in acceptability. Writing Your Profile Many online dating services offer assistance in writing your profile, if you are not a good writer then this may be something you should consider. Before you sit down to write your profile, find out how others see you, so that you can more adequately describe yourself as you are seen. (You don't see yourself as others do - probably) The best way to do this is ask around. You don't have to tell anyone why - just ask for one word that describes your looks, work habits, home environment etc get a list and go from there. Chances are you will come closer to a good description of yourself that way than any other way.To Post a Picture or Not To Post - That is the question Well are you photogenic? You know even if you aren't there has to be a picture somewhere of you that looks good. Find it! Whoever said a picture is worth a thousand words knew what the were talking about. And let's face it - this is a shallow society - we are attracted by looks in addition to pleny of other things - but looks are definetly high on the list. Not putting up a picture leads to suspicion of whether you are attractive or not - what's wrong with you! Put it up there.Free Online Dating Services, Trials, and Charges You get what you pay for - most of the time. Most of the online dating services charge. It's a huge market - just doesn't seem like it when you are actually trying to find a date does it? The best thing to do is find a trial service, or a service that allows you to wink or send eye contact or a smile to another party to let them know you are interested. So if you both just send that and then it goes nowhere you have to decide - are they worth the fee to join the site to find out more. If you do decide to join, keep in mind that most of these sites won't let the other person respond without also having a membership. That does not mean however that you can't send them an alternate method of contacting you. There is nothing more frustrating than being contacted by someone you would like to write back to, but no way to do that unless you also join. Is it worth the fees? Some site editors are not too bright either and you can sneak little ways into your profile that allow future interested parties a way to find you. Such as saying something like - "I have the same name where the little yellow man is" would tell someone that your username at AOL would be the same as your username on the profile and they might then contact you without you either one buying a membership.If you choose to post on more than one site, try to spice each profile up a bit differently. No one wants to read the same thing twice, and what you might have missed out on saying in one profile may be the thing that catches someone's attention on another profile. Use different pictures too. What to be Cautious of Online meeting has allowed us to move a bit faster than traditional dating. Your inhibitions all fall down when you are sitting behind a computer screen and you can do or say or flirt however you want and it's not as difficult as it is face to face. What that usually leads to is assuming you know someone better than you normally would before you've ever had that first date - but beware - their inhibitions were down too and they may have come across a lot greater than they really are. Do You Take Down Your Profile When You Meet Someone? Well - did they take down their profile? If they did, and you are serious about being exclusive, then you should take down your profile. (on all the sites you have it up on) But if they haven't and you aren't then leave it up. Think how many fish swimming around in the sea might nibble on your bait while you have it out there! Perhaps getting online and flirting and maybe even meeting up with someone is the push you need to get out more and enjoy life. Maybe it leads to happily ever after. Whatever it leads to enjoy it and yourself!You can site specific advice and more information as well as recommended sites by visiting my website at www.themarketradar.com

About the author:H M Hovis holds a degree in Mass Communication with an emphasis in Public Relations, and currently works in the casino industry.

Instant Dating Strategies Anyone Can Use

Instant Dating Strategies Anyone Can Use
by: Caterina Christakos

Most of us walk around caught up in our own thoughts. We don't look at people as we walk down the street and we have the radio blasting in the car so we don't even notice those single, sexy individuals in the cars next to us.Tip #1 Get out of your head and into your environment. Instead of saying that there aren't any available guys out there, why not take your head out of your book at Barnes and Noble and notice if anyone is noticing you?There are probably plenty of attractive men out there dying to ask you out. Your body language may be part of the reason why they don't.Tip #2 Have open body language. This means no crossed arms. No hiding behind books. No hunching your shoulders. Tip #3 Make eye contact. Instead of looking down when a cute guy looks at you, meet his gaze. The right eye contact can be sexier than the hottest verbal conversations.Tip #4 Smile more. Studies have proven that a smiling face is thought to be friendlier and more attractive than someone who goes around with a tight jaw. Relax your jaw and allow your lips to be at least partly parted at all times. Notice the difference in how many more people smile, look your way and approach you. About the author:Caterina Christakos is a dating coach and published author. For even more in depth dating tips go to: http://www.seduction-hypnosis.com

e-Matchmaking: Can a Computer Program Find Love For You?

e-Matchmaking: Can a Computer Program Find Love For You?
by: Devlyn Steele

by Devlyn SteeleI logged on to a dating site the other day and was greeted by a large, flashing message. It promised that if I took the time to answer a series of questions that they would find a "perfect match" for me. Imagine that? All the work and worry of being single - gone! We truly have evolved! Not only can computer programs manage the entire traffic system of a city and make chess grandmasters cry, but now they can lead my perfect match right to my doorstep. I always wanted a Stepford wife, I hope it comes assembled.The recent trend in Internet Dating has been the use of a "computer personality test" of some sort. Websites claim that these tests, usually developed by a "top psychologist", have the ability to understand you and your needs through a series of questions. Confused? Lost in love? Problems communicating? Don't worry, the Online Dating Hal 5000 can figure you out! In fact, when you're done, this computer program will know your needs and desires better than you do.Remember the Broadway play “Fiddler on The Roof”? You might not, it was the first Broadway play I went to when I was seven. A song that always stuck in my head for some reason was “matchmaker, matchmaker, make me a match…” The song starts as a plea to the matchmaker to bring true love straight to the altar; someone beautiful, rich, intelligent, and perfect.But by the end of the song, the singer realizes that the Matchmaker might not be up to the task. She decides that “playing with matches, a girl can get burned”.So, do these tests really work?Personality tests have a long history. Really, really smart guys with names like Freud, Maslov, Fromm, and Jung developed respected psychological theories, and these theories are used as the basis for all types of tests. “The Big Five” theory suggests that there are five dimensions of personality: openness to experience, conscientiousness, extraversion, agreeableness, and neuroticism. Some popular personality tests use this as a foundation. Others go the “Big Three” route, which does away with the “openness” and “agreeableness” dimensions - mostly because it’s easier to remember.I joke a little about these theories, but the truth is that they’ve survived the test of time and there is a ton of scientific research behind them. The real question is if these tests can be effective in applying a theory to the complexity of a human being. Add to this the additional layer of meshing your answers with another, equally complex person. That’s a tall order. People have impulsive behavior that simply can’t be measured when they’re sitting, relaxed and introspective, taking one of these tests. Often our answers reflect our perfect (or hopeful) idea of ourselves. Even if we are trying our best to be honest, our impulsive behavior in real-life situations can be far different than we’d expect.Another wildcard is attraction. We can meet someone who’s empirically good-looking, has a similar background, is kind and successful – and yet we’re not attracted. Often we can’t explain why we like another person. It may be how they make us laugh, a crooked smile – even how they smell! Sometimes little things that are immeasurable on their own can collectively make us attracted.Human beings and our emotions and desires are far too complex, and a computer program can’t solve the riddles of our romantic lives. As Jung put it, “the meeting of two personalities is like the contact of two chemical substances; if there is a reaction both are transformed”. It sounds good, but even Jung was hedging his bet when it comes to love. What will cause two individuals to react to each other? Even the developers of the study of personality would not presume that a series of questions could predict romance.If you rely solely on matchmaking services, you are missing the entire beauty of online dating. The beauty is opportunity. Online dating offers you an almost limitless opportunity to meet and date new people. It gives you the time and space to find what best suits you. Going to a quality dating site that isn’t trying to sell you fantasy of finding your match for you will mean you will have a pool of millions of singles to meet.Treat matchmaking options as just another fun way to explore. It can serve as an ice breaker to start a conversation, but don’t expect them to be the answer to finding your perfect match. Keep all options open and explore possibilities. As a unique individual, only can you know what works for you. You need to develop skills to communicate and meet people. Developing both online and offline dating skills is the best way to find the right relationship. Next time you’re brushing your teeth, take a look in the mirror. See that amazing person? That’s your matchmaker with a mouthful of toothpaste. Take charge of your life and get into action! Enjoy dating and enjoy the process of discovery. Your experiences, both good and not-so-good, are essential to finding the right person for you.

About the author:Devlyn Steele ("America's Leading Life-Coach") is a Relationship Coach, Life-Coach, radio host, columnist, and the developer of ToolsToLife.com . His new program OnlineDatingKit.com teaches Internet daters the skills they need to find their perfect matches on their own.

Online Dating Tips

Online Dating Tips
by: Frank Duru

Finding your soul mate online is a wondrous thing; however, there is the potential for danger. While you have access to a wide variety of people, you also have the impending complication of meeting those who are not what they seem to be--there are some tips of the trade, though, to help you become more discerning with your choices. These tips can help you stay safe and stay away from men and women who are not what you’re looking for.Tip One: Start Slowly. There are all kinds of people on the Love Empire; not all of these people, however, will be right for you. Take your time--if you meet someone and start up a conversation, proceed with discretion. The person at the other end may not be who they claim to be; take your time and watch for inconsistencies or odd behavior. If something bothers you, simply walk away. Do not rush into any relationship without thinking first.Tip Two: Protect Your Identity. One of the benefits of dating online is that you can get to know someone based solely upon their personality and not deal with the more social conscious real world. It is up to you to decide when and how you reveal who you really are--be careful, however. If someone receives your personal information, they could use it against you. If a member tries to pressure you into giving out your last name, email address, home address, phone number, place of work or any other identifying information, then walk away.Tip Three: Use Common Sense. When speaking to someone through the Love Empire, do not throw good judgment away simply because this is an online service. What may sound wonderful on the screen can be masking something not so wonderful in reality. Use caution and do not fall in love with the first profile you read. Take your time and go through all of your potential choices. Then, after you’ve researched enough, go from there. It is a common occurrence for people to “fall in love” after only one conversation. Do not do this! Retain your common sense and view online dating as you view real-world dating. You do not have to love every profile you read.Tip Four: Request A Photo. If you meet someone, chat with them, and see the beginning of a relationship forming, then you might want to request a photo. Often, this can tell you more about the person than any email or instant message. First of all, it can keep them from lying about their looks; secondly, you will know if you’re attracted to them in the physical sense; finally, if they continually refuse to send a photo, there might be a reason other than embarrassment. Proceed carefully.Tip Five: Pay Attention. This is, possibly, the most important tip you could follow. In an email, any one can sound wonderful--in real life, it’s much more difficult. When you are becoming involved with someone on the Love Empire, watch for ‘red flags’, or odd behavior. For example, if during an online session, your date suddenly becomes angry or aggressive toward you and then, won’t explain why, you should take this into consideration. If one sentence could upset him/her in such a way, it might be cause to worry. Also, pay attention to any attempts to pressure or control you. For instance, if your date is constantly making demeaning comments about you, there is a strong chance that he/she is trying to manipulate you into feeling inferior; therefore, you become an easier target to control. Finally, watch out for inconsistencies with information that your date provides you or evasive answers to questions. If your date displays any of the following problems, it would be well-advised to reconsider your relationship:1. He/she provides inconsistent information about age, interests, appearance, marital status, profession, employment, etc.2. He/she refuses to speak to you on the phone after you have established an3. online relationship; or, he/she will only speak on a strangely specific4. timeframe.5. He/she will not answer any direct questions about themselves. They will6. either give you a vague answer or will simply turn the question back to you.7. He/she will only provide photos of large groups of people, making it8. impossible for you to find them.Online dating can be an exciting and fulfilling part of your life; just rememberto follow these tips and act accordingly.

About the author:Frank Duru is the author of many different articles. His works concentrate much on dating related information, such as "African Dating - Pride and Ambition", “Religious Dating - Traditions and Values” The list goes on! Click here to visit his site loveempire.net. Find more interracial and Dating related articles there.